How did children deal with bullies

Lousy comrades: pampered children become bullies


According to a new study, children of over-cautious parents kill others. But the perpetrators are often targeted, say education experts.

If children and adolescents get caught up in comrades, the parents of the culprits have also committed a crime. "Be careful with parenting," warns Jamie Abaied, assistant professor of psychology at the University of Vermont, on In her new study, she comes to the conclusion that children who are closely monitored by their parents are more likely to bully others.

Experts confirm the phenomenon. "Every day I deal with children and young people who bully others," says education expert Sefika Garibovic. They are girls and boys who have been controlled by their parents for years. Educational scientist Marco Hüttenmoser also notes that control and bullying are close together. It is a great frustration for children when they are constantly rebuked by their parents. "Because they are dependent on their parents and can therefore hardly defend themselves against them, they look for victims on the way to school and on the playground."

"Bullies have several faces"

Bullying takes many forms. For example, according to the American study, children do not invite others to a birthday party. Young people expose their comrades or exclude them. Garibovic knows what makes bullies tick: "Such children are usually very intelligent and have three or four faces." She remembers countless examples of bullying cases. The perpetrators laughed at other children, spread lousy rumors and tensed up intrigues.

"There are also those who hide hats and watches in the garbage bag and are happy when they make others cry with them." According to Garibovic, the bullies are also often violent. "A boy from an elite high school threw the whole lunch in the face of a student." Other bullies would beat up their victims.

Parents terrorize children with phone calls

The experts see the bullies as victims of their parents. Sefika Garibovic often experiences parents who constantly call their children. "There are 15-year-olds who are called 17 times a day by their parents and have to tell them where they are with whom." Many parents would also run from examination to examination with their children in order to breed “super children”. Some parents also controlled their children's circle of friends. "You only allow contact at home." According to Garibovic, this makes the offspring dependent, suffers from a lack of self-esteem and self-doubt. "Their own insecurity turns children into perpetrators."

Marco Hüttenmoser also sees bullying as a consequence of the lack of freedom. "Today's children are over-cared for from morning to night by day nurseries, day schools, leisure courses and parents." They lacked opportunities to let off steam with other children and to discuss their frustration at home with them.

The children of control freaks do not always become perpetrators. "Many also become victims of bullying," says Garibovic. Growing up “under a bell” makes them weak personalities and thus ideal targets.

Have you bullied other people? Then get in touch and tell us your story:

Have you bullied other people? Then get in touch and tell us your story: